#9: Ski ya later!
“Your friend is your needs answered.”
You know those days when you just can’t anymore? I didn’t leave a word out, sometimes I just cannot deal. Sure, my overall attitude is improving; I’m calmer now (thanks Aqua Calm!), I feel better, I even sleep better. Still, the day-to-day minutia of my life overwhelms me.
Recently, when a good friend asked if I wanted to join her and her family on a weekend ski trip, I immediately said yes. Before you go on please know that I am a notorious avoider of plans, often canceling at the last minute. When I said yes with such enthusiasm we both knew two things: First, I was definitely going, and second, I really needed to get away if I was willing to step out of my comfort zone so quickly.
Traveling with another family meant that I didn’t have to deal with any of the issues that my own family runs into while traveling. A literal “not my circus, not my monkeys.”
My friends asked if I was crazy. Who willingly travels with someone else’s kids? What if they fight? Who will you ski with? What if you get lonely? Me, so, me, so? Traveling like that gives you a glimpse into what goes on in other houses.
I think a perspective shift is always good to recalibrate your own life. Living in someone else’s life gives you a chance to see that things are never perfect. There are speed bumps throughout everyone’s journey. We put way too much pressure on ourselves to keep up with what we perceive to be the perfection of other people’s lives.
The truth is life is messy, life is difficult, and life is hard. It’s also beautiful, rewarding, and precious. Seeing it from another angle forces us to realize this. So does removing the stress from our lives. I’ve noticed that SAM (which I use at night and in the morning) and G5 (at night) both reduce the stress in my life and give me a better sleep than I’ve had in years. These changes, while subtle, have a huge impact. While watching my friend and her family interact in a way that I wish mine could, I didn’t feel the usual pangs of jealousy. I felt a warm happy feeling knowing that I was part of it, at least for a weekend. I was happy for her. Instead of spending the weekend wishing and longing to share similar moments with my own family, I allowed myself to be fully immersed in what was happening around me.
When I came home I was full of promise and hope. I didn’t look at my family negatively because we weren’t able to get past our issues; instead I looked forward to a time when we would be able to. It was such a different feeling and much healthier, in my opinion. To not compare but to inspire should be our ultimate goal, and slowly with a little help, I think we can all get there.